i just finished a Sleepy hollow that i'm indecisive about watching and even recording. good to watch some of while eating, i decide. start tweaking on other things but try to pay enough attention to feel i'm still "completing" it. not to mention that i get to delete (instead of inconclusively watching it later which also means i wouldn't get to delete it now).
getting THIS blog done because maybe i'll free of the energy! more particularly this last couple days as i feel more in tune with wanting - deciding for - only heaven. i'm ascertaining, and throwing my lot in with, the use of "my" experience of a separate awareness be about a story of opening "back" into the One. Asking One's Will on this though, cause while this is all in the conceptual area, what else can I do?!
so i want to vision my time, resources, "other" interests to now not just be practices of the NOW, but how they support my story of THE RETURN. Like today clearing more of the patio to have it more idyllic when i sat next to meditate and read.
but the energy mentioned still pulled at me. the "well this extra corner is actually part of the idyllic area intended". the "well i'm this close to this, it's more efficient than putting it of and the sense of reward is worth adjusting the original intention". not today though, the "well its easier to keep going like this or i guess i don't want' to do the Self honoring (i'm getting a sense now of how that's the same as not believing I'm worth it, or in short - worthwhile).
i'll "finish" this here, and turn to today's practice: Only Salvation can be said to cure. Speak to us Father, that we may be healed.
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