tiredness

"hard" to figure out what to do or say besides just entering that word for that energy.  "hard" lurking right after the tired anyway, but the sleepier quality makes even the hard energy slip away when noticed.  painful though. maybe like a tension leotard getting more compressed (and even "attacking") as it is more up, so especially the face, crown.  wishing i could either go up or down.  to either feel energetic and inspired to partake and/or handle the events shrapneling me:  chores, aesthetic tweaking, projects of course, aging/imminent needs (hammock), spiritual studies that are actually the only thing.  the latter though, cognition doesn't seem to have sufficient gas.  funny that getting up and tweaking on something seems like that could have momentum instead of gas, whereas reading or meditating or continuing this is too imploding, too tired.  i'm going to check  craigslist now.  that hammock will is my spiritual "duty" because i can make my tiredness spiritual by using it to join with the sun!